Deep in….

Deep in…

Deep in the snow play the joyful memories

Of all snow balls rolling in our eyes

Deep in the snow stands the snow man with his black eyes

Smiling in his splendid snow whiteness

Deep in the snow rises the desire of embracing

The purity and beauty of the snow-covered peaks

Deep in the snow I smell the scent of your soul

Approaching me with all its whiteness

Deep in the snow I cry with joy

Opening my arms to this overcoming magnificence

10.12.2010

Fereshteh Vaziri

 

Alienation(poem)

Alienation

Alienation settles on my skin

Makes me black makes me yellow

The wheat in my skin covers all the white in me

I get estranged

 

Alienation

Settles on my tongue

Like a viscid substance

Rotates my words

Makes them a row of larks in chain

Utters them improperly

Under the very look of thousand eyes

I get estranged

 

Alienation settles on my Name

Makes it difficult to write or to pronounce

I am related to distant primitive tribes

Those obstacles for civilization wheels

I get estranged shortly after my birth

 

Born as a stranger

I walk like a stranger

I talk like a stranger

In a country that is mine

In a country that is theirs

January 2011 Fereshteh Vaziri

 

Illusory World

We are all somehow entrapped in the illusory world of internet. Some people pass long hours before this colorful tricky screen, trying to realize their desires. They play, read, write, find new worlds, communicate, make love and fall in  love there. What’s the identity of the people who we get to know on the internet, noone knows. A “Trueman” world?

Germany

The gloomy sky is hanging over there, days and days and the gloom doesn’t leave my heart. “Dont cry for me Argentina” is repeated in my head. Iran has a lot of victims, it doesn’t cry for any of them. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4oPWINVVEw&feature=related

Don’t cry for me Argentina
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise
Don’t keep your distance

identity

I always felt so self-confident, I was sure that I am able to do everything that I want and I am interesting enough for a lot of people. I’ve lost this feeling. Is that the gaze that makes me so insecure? You are somehow defined by your social status. If you’re ashamed of what you are, you don’t like yourself. I often think about him, about the respect that he showed me. It was false respect; he rather respect my position than what I was. Who Am I? A weak disappointed woman or a proud self-confident instructor, as they saw me in my classes? How could I be so weak when I love someone? Why is separation so painful for me ? I don’t know, I just don’t know.

Old age

It’s sorrowful that your feelings do not grow old the way your body does. It’s the reason that many people behave themselves funny. I always misjudged other people because they didn’t behave their age and now? Do I behave mine? Is there a certain behavoir adjusted for an age? Can I not be romantic when my heart still is? I feel sad when I think that I should control myself and limit myself to my age.  Was it my first and last love, the experience that I had with him? I soothe myself, telling my passionate inner child that I could once experience passionate love and that’s enough, but I don’t believe in that. I still need it, I still want it.

The Sun And The Sea

    

Can your delicate fingers/

Carry the huge wax wings/

To fly and fly further and further?/

 What if the sun is nothing but an illusion?/

What if the sun is nothing but poisonous fluid?/

What if the fall is as inevitable as flight?/

What if …?/


 Look at my mysterious waves!/

You subtle flying figure!/

The sun of ambition,/

Can only burn your weary wings./

Cool your burning arms,/

In the bed of my azure streams/

Come to me!/

Come to my bed of beauty, life and love!/

Experience the calming coldness of the vast ocean,/

In my open arms!/

The flight and the fall/

Are both the meeting pointsOf the fate,/

 That awaits us all/

  18.06.2004 

Love

It’s difficult to define love in this chaotic world in which nothing has a meaning. Am I unable to love? or am too reasonable? He tells me I am unable to love. I think you should be able to sacrifice for your love and when you can’t you’re not in love. I am at least frank. He claims that he loves without being able to sacrifice anything for it. I do believe that love should have a ground to stand on. I don’t believe in eternal love. There are lots of people that you can love in different periods of your life. True love is a lie!!!!

Alienation

Everyday that I wake up I find myself in a strange room, a room that is pretty unfamiliar. Where I am and what I do is unknown. Metamorphosis? No! I am still the same person, but something is gone. “Leidenschaft” they say. The grey sky over there is not mine! Mine is a blue shiny one far far away! Am I lost? Where can I find myself? The cold industrial God is standing over there, observing my Sisyphus-like stuggles and laughs, laughs so loudly that I freez in my dreams. What a nightmare!!!!

Immigration

Immigration is a pain, deep in you, even if you don’t recognize it. There is no cure for it. You leave your country to find your fortune somewhere else. You become aleinated from  your own society and you remain alien in the new society. You are always a stranger there even if you have their ID card or their passport. A stranger everywhere, a stranger, who like the Arab in Camus’s work is killed by another native-stranger of the society. Strangers, strangers, strangers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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